Almost done with week 1!

Wow, this week went quick! School has been good- a lot to get used to for both the boys and I. Carmelo (7th grade) has done ALL of his previous schooling online with a video teacher talking him through it all. Now he has to read all of his instruction and read the text in his textbooks and workbook. A lot of reading to get used to. Henley and Trey are not strong enough readers to read a direction and comprehend what it is telling them to do. They are amazing students but until we get to the point where they can read a problem I will be making up the curriculum to strengthen their reading comprehension. It's fun and weird making up kids school- I didn't thing I would actually be doing any lesson plans, but its another new thing that I get to tackle. We do a full hour of art everyday which the boys LOVE and so do I, its a good break from all the bookwork.
Two babies have died since I've come, neither of which I had spent time with- the one was only a couple months old and died of heart failure. The other a little girl, came in two days ago and died yesterday. Licia told me before she died she was tending to her and saw that her fists were clamped shut. Her fingernails had grown so long that they cut into the palm of her hands and it was all scabbed. When Licia pried her fingers open she saw that her fingers had begun to rot- she could see all the way to her bones on the inside of her fingers. She told me only once before had she seen a babies body literally beginning to decompose before they actually passed. The little girl died yesterday. This is the reality of Haiti. Kids are literally dead before they die here. Body and mind- they don't get the amount of nutrition they need if they even get food at all and their bodies wither away. They dont get the attention a kid should get and stimulation enough for their mind to even have the desire to live. It's horrible what happened to this little girl but I know her story got me thinking... and hopefully her life will touch others too.
Tomorrow instead of having school we are going, with 27 Haitians packed into some sort of bus, to a fort that was recently discovered up in the mountains. When Haiti rose up for independence from France they built many forts all throughout Haiti to fight if they needed to... they never did so in Haiti history books it speaks of these forts. Ive been to one, close to where I was last time in Haiti but this one was in the history books and no one knew where it was. It will be fun to get to be one of the first to go see it- apparently the community around it is now making a road so it will be accessible and everyone in Cazale is prideful and excited about finding it. So it should be a fun trip!
Two days ago the generator died so weve been running the house on and extention chord hooked up to a small generator downstairs- it gave us one fan at night to sleep with. Because there arent any plug in lights it was PITCH dark. Ive never experienced that kind of darkness. there are no streetlights or anything here so literally I felt blind. Once I found my cell phone I had that, but when it ran out of batteries I went to bed. The sound of rats running around was enough for me to turn it in... haha. About an hour ago the generator was fixed and its amazing. God is good! It makes me appreciate lights and fans and computers and refrigerators so much more :)
Hope everyone has a good weekend!
Anna

Cazale- my new home.

I'm back in Haiti and already can tell I am going to love the year ahead of me. The family is great and the kids are so fun. I will be homeschooling 3 boys during the weekdays, we are starting school this Monday:
Carmelo (7th grade)
Henley (2nd grade)
Trey (1st grade)

Henley and Trey are both biological children to Enoch(Haitian) and Licia(American). Licia has lived here now 15 years working side-by side with her sister, Lori, and their Dad, Zach. I have not met their father yet, as he's in the states. Carmelo is Haitian and being adopted by Licia and Enoch; and he just received his visa to go to the states and he and Licia are both ecstatic. He has never been and is full of questions and excitement. They will leave next Monday and he'll just take school with him. Hes excited for certain things he has heard about from the rest of his family; his eyes twinkle as he talks about eating a cheeseburger from McDonald's and going to Wal-mart for the first time. Licia tells him Wal-mart is a place where you buy stuff and its so big that you can't see the back of the store from the entrance. He is shocked and amazed that they give you food on a plane, and there's a hole where you can hook up headphones into in your seat! He's so cute with his disbelief and I am excited for him- what a crazy week they'll have! Can you imagine not even being able to wrap your head around where the toilet takes the flushed water? Or how a store could be bigger than you can see from the entrance. Or the fact that you can buy any kind of food you want- and not even that, but most of the food he has never heard of. It will be the trip of a lifetime for Carmelo!


I am at a place where they have two main ministries going on. There is the rescue center where kids are taken in, severely malnourished, burned, injured etc and they care for them until they are healthy enough to go home to their families, or get adopted (Guess where I'll be during my spare time). Then there is the clinic, which is open Mon-Thurs form early morning to 5ish where people come in from all over for anything and everything. People come in who need cuts sewn up, help for their sick family member or themselves, pregnant woman about to go into labor, and anything you can and can't imagine.

Yesterday I was up in the school area getting myself familiar with all the subjects and figuring out a schedule, I got called down to the clinic where Licia asked me if I liked blood and gore. I followed her into a small room where a 19 year old young woman (so... my age last year) lay spread legged ready to have a baby. They don't often deliver at the clinic but this woman was extremely swollen and contracting, and when I came in the baby had already crowned. The mom had only seen a doctor once when she first was pregnant and had no care since then. Her family was mad at her for getting pregnant and left her at the clinic, so Lori had no choice but to deliver. Scared she would tear and loose too much blood Lori cut her and short after the baby was born, a little girl. Mom was trembling and hurt but Lori and the Haitian staff were able to talk her through it. It was the first time I saw a birth in person. They let me cut the umbilical chord and I sat with the seconds old child while Lori felt the mother's stomach for the placenta. She felt a hard spot and after a few seconds realized moms not done.

There was a second child- they were fraternal, so in different sacks. The baby was positioned on the mothers right side and breach. Lori was able to push the baby down but worried that there would be complications with the baby coming out feet first. She cut the baby's sack once it was in sight and two little feet popped out. After some pushing, the torso and one arm appeared. Not good news... Lori explained to all of us that the babies arm could be caught over it's head and when coming out could possibly break it's collarbone. We all prayed as she delivered the second girl and one we heard crying, everyone knew a miracle had just happened. The mom then delivered the placenta (nasty) and Lori sewed her back up. By the time the twins were born, the woman's father and sister had come back and helped name them: Mirlanda and Jolanda. Please pray for this new mother and her girls- that they are healthy and strong. Pray that the mother of surprise twins finds food for her family every day and that she is able to care for them. Pray that her family stays by her side and that they see the miracle that God gave them in these two baby girls alive, and that the mother realizes how lucky she is to still be alive. It was definitely a cool way to be "initiated" into the lifestile this family lives...

It is beyond hot here, and for those of you who know me well that says a lot. I am constantly sweating and can't get enough fan time. The family takes a walk every day, and the surroundings are beautiful. We walked about 3 miles yesterday along a road that went through mountains, and we watched the sun set behind the ocean in the distance. We are going on a 7 mile hike in about an hour... Licia and Lori are full of stories about the flood that happened not too long ago, and the Haitian culture and their neighbors. Its so cool that they share so much already.
Well, that's about long enough for today, I will continue to post as time allows
here is the blog website for the rescue center... Licia posts often and is far better at it than I am :)
http://haitirescuecenter.wordpress.com/

One Year.

Its been one year since the worst day of my life, last year on September 29th Berlancia passed away, about 2 and a half months after I left Haiti from my 9 month trip there. Its been the best and the worst year of my life since then. SO much has happened in this past year and all of it changed my life for the better.
Berlancia had full blown AIDS and I worked with her all 9 months at GLA. She wasn't on my initial list of kids when I got there the first day, but my second day there, the volunteer coordinator asked me to take her all day as well as still taking my other kids for an hour each. He told me she was a failure to thrive child, and wasn't developing. Every day with her was a challenge, one that I found myself wanting the night to go quicker for so I could have another day with her. She was sick at least every two weeks with a high fever, constipation, and an ongoing ear infection which she had for her whole life. Berlancia's spirit was indescribable. I found myself missing her if I went out on the weekends, and wanting to stay as late as I could after dinner with her until we went up to the house where we slept. I can't imagine where I would be in life right now if God hadn't brought Berlancia and I together for those 9 months, and I also don't understand His timing in taking her. I don't think I ever will. She had an adoptive family, loving parents and siblings waiting for the day they got to see their daughter and sister face-to-face. They never did.

She changed my life more than anyone will ever understand, and my whole passion for Haiti is in memory of her. She was perfect in every way- the way she laughed, looked at me, reached for me, smiled, got jealous when i spent time with other kids. I will never forget her first time standing up by herself, her first steps, the way she yelled at me, the way I went around the corner and waited for a while and would peek back, and there she sat smiling- knowing I would come back. Even when she was sick, I loved how she would just lay on me, and be able to get completely relaxed in my arms. I miss the Haitian staff knowing me as "mama Berlancia" and handing her to me every morning when I walked in, her diaper full and then handing me a clean diaper for after her bath in the wagon. I miss everything about her.

I have no doubt in my mond that Berlancia would have grown up to be a strong, loving and loved person in this world. She fought with spirit and spunk until the end and I will never forget her. She is the reason I am go back to Haiti and has opened my heart to serving others, despite the pain it can cause. In the long-run having 9 months with Berlancia was worth the hurt and sadness it caused me when she died, and still causes me. People ask me if it's hard working in Haiti, its a hard question to answer... only having been there less than a year I've gone through the hardest things I've ever had to, but I've also gotten to experience the most amazing things ever. So I guess it is hard, but after having been there it would be harder living here and not being able to experience those things.

Theres a movie I love called beyond borders, and I would recommend it just for this quote- it sums up my life in a way that is hard to express in words. A man whos life is devoted to working on bettering lives in a thirdworld country is responding to someone's concern about pain in a surgery without painkillers... his response to the woman:

"We drown it. Kill it. Numb it, anything not to feel. You know, when I was a doctor in London, no one ever said 'medahani'. They don't thank you like they thank you here. Cos here they feel everything, straight from God. There's no drugs, no painkillers. It's the weirdest, purest thing - suffering. And when you've seen that kind of courage in a li... - (pauses, tears well up) -... in a child... How could you ever want to do anything but just hold him in your arms?"

That is exactly what has happened to me... and now all I want to do is be in Haiti...

Thank you Berlancia for showing me that courage and loving me. Thank you for teaching me more than any course in school could teach and showing me more about life just through your spirit, I will never forget you.

This is a poem a good friend Rhyan wrote and sent me right after Berlancia died:

Although I was not her mother

I cared for her each day,

I cuddled, sang and read to her

And watched her as she played.

I saw each new accomplishment,

I helped her grow and learn.

I understood her language,

I listened with concern.

She came to me for comfort,

And I kissed away her tears.

She proudly showed her work to me,

I gave the loudest cheers!

No, I was not her mother,

But my role wass just as strong.

I nurtured her and kept her safe,

Though maybe not for long.

And now this time has come,

When we will have to part.

But I know this child I cared for,

Is forever in my heart!

Here is a link to a video Rhyan made for Berlancia... who is now dancing in heaven

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wW-MHhWbX7Q&eurl=http://www.becausehecalled.blogspot.com/&feature=player_embedded#t=14

a life worth living.

If you were to ask a group of people what they want to accomplish before they die, I would bet that a majority of the people would mention something about helping others, or touching just one person.. so many people strive to affect others or help just one person in life. Sabrina passed last night, well exceeding most people's ambitions. She passed peacefully in her host mothers arms and could not have been more loved by us all. In her short life she not only changed my life, but touched everyone who saw her through her journey. A Haitian man who works at GLA came up to me while I was tube-feeding Sabrina and said "I was scared of her the day she came in. Her head made me forget that she was just a baby." He is also the man that would come in sometimes to do something and when he walked in the room he'd say her name and often got distracted by talking to her for a short while before he went off to continue what he actually had come to do. Just by living through an impossible situation for as long as she did, Sabrina opened minds to many and allowed us to love her for what she was most importantly- a child of God. Nothing else matters, whether she had a brain makes no difference to the value of her life in God's eyes and because of that I and many others who were blessed enough to know her during her time on earth got to learn from her. I am still a bit in shock, it wasn't something anyone expected and it isn't an easy thing to be positive about everything when I know how much work people did to get her to the states and how many people were praying for her, but I do know that she could not be in a better place, so there is peace in that. Not only will I miss her and remember her forever, she is the reason I went back to Indiana and found out about a place called Real Hope For Haiti Rescue Center...

"Falling Into Place"

It's interesting how we use the term "falling into place" when things all seem to go right in some area in our lives, but I don't believe things fall into place, rather God puts them into place to help us realize His will for us and assure us that He is in control of our lives when we ask Him to. While visiting with Rebekah right before I left, she was showing me pictures of a place in Haiti which takes in severe cases of anything and everything. The RHFH rescue center in Cazale, Haiti is a medical heaven for the country of Haiti and Rebekah mentioned how much I would enjoy going there. She casually said the couple who ran it had been searching for a teacher for their 3 boys for a while. Rebekah sent off an email asking if they were still in need of a teacher and the next day I flew to Minnesota to visit Jane, an amazing friend who I met in Haiti my first trip. The day after I came to MN, I recieved a phone call from Rebekah saying to check my email, she had forwarded me an email from Licia, the mother of the 3 boys at the rescue center, who was still searching for a teacher and very anxious to find out more about me. Within a couple days of emailing her I was ready to commit, and after talking to the first teacher the boys had, for 6 monthslast year, I knew for sure and sent off an email telling her "yes." Today I recieved a ticket confirmation in my inbox... I am moving to Haiti on September 14th. I am SO excited and can't believe how quick and perfect things happen when God is in charge. Every timeI had pursued some opportunity in Haiti before it really just didnt seem perfect or right, it took me taking the backseat for everything to happen. The place I am going is an established rescue center in Haiti and I can't express how blessed I feel to get to be a part of it... here is a link to the website- check it out!! It's amazing

http://haitirescuecenter.wordpress.com/

Missing Sabrina from Minnesota

SOOO sorry I haven't updated everyone back home on Sabrina. It's been a crazy ride. She is doing well and now with her host family in Indianapolis where she will stay most likely a month until she goes to her adoptive family. I can't say surgery day was an easy day but I think it went best for Sabrina, as there were no complication! God is good... Stephanie, her host mom is a peds nurse and Sabrina could not be in better hands :) She is doing much better since surgery and although not seizure free they are much more under control and calmer. She is now taking up to an ounce through bottle feeding, a huge improvement from vomiting if we tried before I brought her over. It was hard leaving her but much easier having gotten to stay with her host family for the week or so during/after surgery and knowing how much they love her and are more than equip to take care of her! I am now in Minnesota where I am visiting a dear friend, Jane who was in Haiti for 6 months of my first trip and we are soon leaving to go to Manitoba for another friends wedding! It is all much needed distraction from being away from Haiti and Sabrina and I have been looking forward to it all school year so it is great! Before I left Rebekah took some pics of Sabrina and they are AMAZING :) she's such a stunning baby.

my pic app isn't working but I will post them later, and thanks again for all the continued prayer for Sabrina. She has already done so much in her life touching others and we are praying her brain will just grow and God will perform a miracle in her.

Baby Sabrina: My life for the last 2 months.

This is Sabrina. She was born in Haiti with hydroanecephaly... a combination of cerebral spinal fluid in her head and a lack of brain. In her case she has a brain stem but no cerebellum. She was born on May 20th while I was in Indiana visiting the Hubleys; the adoptive family of Wendjy-love (now Jonas) who I had for 8 months in Haiti last year while I volunteered at GLA. We first had a doctor in Sacramento who was going to take her as a patient on a medical visa but as soon as he received the CT scan he politely declined her case. My family had agreed to host her after the surgery and it that moment was the first of many lows in the roller coaster ride of getting Sabrina to the US on a medical visa. Hands that Heal: and organization Rebekah Hubley (the adoptive mother of Jonas) started, bringing Haitians into the states on medical visas for surgeries. Their blog is at handsthatheal.blogspot.com.... it has posts from the whole process of getting this beautiful child of God home.

I went to Haiti June 8th for a week to take her back to Indiannapolis for surgery and actually left Haiti a month later on July 15th and arrived just in time as she had become worse and worse gradually. The travels went well, especially after starting out for the airport at a degree of 92.7F. After holding her close through the airport and on the first plane she warmed up and although a long day we made it. Her seizures got MUCH worse on the trip home and then continued to worsten when her host mother, Stephanie took her to the ER the night before surgery was scheduled. She had surgery on Friday and was discharged from the hospital last night and is doing well. I was a mess the whole day of surgery, as I had slept 4 hours in the 2+ days since I had left Haiti and was worried because of her high likelyhood that she would have comlications during surgery. She is now vomiting 95% less and her seizures are much less frequent. PRAISE GOD!!

Her future is still unknow to all but God, and her diagnosis is easy to be discouraged by but we all know God has brought her her for a reason and whatever happens to her will be Perfect and His plan. I have stayed with Stephanie to help a little for her first few days and will stay probably through tuesday. She is a peds nurse, and could not be in better hands and I can't describe the relief knowing she will be in this home for recovery... God is good. It will be hard to leave her, I am dreading the day but the rest of the summer is filled with travel and visiting dear friends so I will manage- and hopefully updates will come often as to how she is. Thanks for all the prayers and please continue to pray for a miracle for this child of God and for brain growth.

These people made her trip to the US possible- I thank God for all of you every day...

Dixie- founder of the orphanage GLA in Haiti where Sabrina was first given a chance and gave up time and sanity to get her ready to leave Haiti.
Susan- a nurse selflessly sacrificing her time to care for the children at GLA and she was an amazing nurse to Sabrina until I took her to the states. I couldn't have done it without all your help and training :)

Rebekah- founder of Hands that Heal and put her whole heart and soul and MANY hours into getting Sabrina legally ready to come to Indiana

Stephanie- AMAZING nurse who was more than willing to love and care for Sabrina after her surgery.

Dr. Young- For taking on Sabrina and donating your time and talents to those who need it most- for Sabrina who would literally not have had a chance without you

EVERYONE back home and all around the world for praying for Sabrina.

Above is Sabrina after surgery, doing great :)